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Her Boyfriend Is a Serial Flirter

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Her Boyfriend Is a Serial Flirter

Name: maryann
Location: Manhattan , NY
Question: I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 8 months.
We have great sex and are pretty much living together. He started dating
me very soon after breaking up with another one who he seemed to care
about. The problem is that I have concerns about trusting him. He's a
huge flirt and flirts with other women in front of me all the time.
Also, he has a lot of women "friends" who are always hanging around him.
Some of these women seem to have huge crushes on him (he's somewhat of
a public figure), though all parties involved act as though they are
"just friends." I don't understand why these women keep coming around so
much. Any thoughts? |Age: 41

Can we please start clarifying the "kinda living together" thing? Unless you both have given up your primary residence, you are not living together. You are staying at each other's place. I truly believe this is where many women are making huge, huge missteps in their relationships. You're getting too comfortable, too quickly and reading way more into what's really going on in your relationships. Just because you see each other 3 times a week doesn't mean your exclusive. Even though you you leave your stuff at his place that doesn't mean you live with him.

The only thing that clarifies exclusivity is a verbal conversation wherein both of you agree not to see other people.

Now...with that said.....

I can't glean anything about your relationship from what you've said. Dated 8 months, great sex, kinda living together. Are you just being insecure? Is he a dog and not to be trusted? No idea.

So, your guy is a flirt? Hmmm...well....he is a man, after all. That is what they do when they see a pretty woman. It's instinctual. Can you get him to curb that? Maybe a little, but that desire will always be there. One or two close female friends is not a big deal. But if a guy has multiple (like, way more female than male) friends then that's a problem. Coudd be a sign that he requires constant female attention because he's insecure. Not very attractive.

Why do these women keep coming around him? Well, probably because he lets them and maybe even encourages them. I'm friends with a Broadway actor who's currently in a show. He's got a serious girlfriend. He's incredibly cute. Women dig him, men want to be him. But you can tell after talking with him for five minutes that he's not available. That's a vibe that people put out and it's one easily sensed, as is the opposite. There are only two kinds of women who will actively pursue or overtly flirt with a guy with a girlfriend. Either she's desperate/crazy OR she's been given valid reasons to believe that the guy is interested.

Do these women all seem crazy? If so, ignore them. But if they don't, and they think nothing of flirting with him in front of you then you have a reason to be concerned. Obviously, they don't feel your presence in this guys life poses a threat. The fact that he flirts with other women in front of you makes him classless and insensitive. Is that something you're willing to tolerate? Something must be keeping you in this relationship. Is it somethign worth ignoring his flirtatious behavior?

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Her Boyfriend Is a Serial Flirter